If self-respect is about valuing yourself,
and self-discipline is about doing what’s needed,
then self-awareness is the bridge between the two—
because you can’t lead yourself if you don’t know yourself.
And knowing yourself… that starts with the questions you ask.
From “Why Me?” to “What Now?”
There was a time in my life when my thoughts were flooded with disempowering questions.
Why do I always mess this up?
Why am I like this?
Why do I keep feeling this way?
But through years of reading, training, and working with others—
through the influence of thinkers like Carol Dweck, Angela Duckworth, and research from the world of positive psychology—
I realized that the quality of your questions determines the trajectory of your life.
Now, I don’t ask “Why do I feel defensive?”
I ask, “What can I do in this moment to respond with strength and clarity?”
I don’t ask “Why am I so stuck?”
I ask, “What’s one action I can take to move forward?”
This shift—from judgment to curiosity, from shame to strategy—is where self-awareness becomes power.
Why This Matters for Kids (and Adults)
When we teach kids to ask better questions, we’re not just helping them behave better.
We’re helping them think better.
And when a child begins to think differently, they begin to act differently.
Instead of saying,
*“Why can’t I get this?”
We teach them to ask,
“What’s one step I can take to get better at this?”
That small shift changes everything.
It moves them out of helplessness and into growth.
That’s what we’re building through the Power of Self—a mindset that’s not just reactive, but reflective and empowering.
What It’s Looked Like in My Life
Even today, as a grown man with a story that started in the streets of the South Bronx and stretched across stages and dojos around the world, I still ask myself questions.
But now they sound like this:
- What does strong leadership look like in this moment?
- What would the best version of me choose right now?
- What do I want to model for the people watching—especially the kids?
Those kinds of questions keep me grounded. Focused. In integrity with who I’m still becoming.
Final Thoughts
Self-awareness isn’t about overanalyzing yourself.
It’s about guiding your attention in a way that leads to growth.
So instead of asking why you’re feeling down, stuck, or overwhelmed…
Try asking:
- What do I need right now to move forward?
- What strength can I practice today?
- What choice aligns with who I want to be?
Empowering questions create empowered lives.
This is the mindset I wish I had as a teenager.
It’s the mindset I’m teaching now—on the mats, in classrooms, and through every blog, video, and talk I give.
Because this kind of awareness… changes everything.
Let’s keep building it.
Let’s keep Living Strong.
— Peter
